Wednesday, December 23, 2015

To Gammie, Papa, Noah and Gianna

“To Gammie, Papa, Noah and Gianna – All my love, Mariah”

We are all still in shock and in disbelief. We still can’t believe she took her own life. When I think of it my mind immediately goes to her last day. You can’t help but think how lost and alone she must have felt. Her mind full of shattered memories, her hope faded and her strength depleted. Amazingly she still is managing to talk to us and letting us know she is ok. Mariah’s grandmother messaged me last week. She said she found this letter in her night stand drawer, it’s a letter Mariah wrote her when she was at crossroads a year ago. I find it amazing how all these letters and pictures start popping after her death. Is it a coincidence? I don’t think so! I would like to believe that Mariah is still around reminding us of her love and NOT to let her struggles go unforgotten.

“Today you all have been on my mind A LOT.” -Mariah

“Please never forget how much I Love you!” - Mariah

“I will spend a lifetime kicking myself for letting a drug be my only focus.” - Mariah

“Can’t wait to see you!!” - Mariah

1 comment:

  1. Two years ago Mariah bravely stood up at Mingus Mountain Academy and told the girls there who were just like her about the struggles she faced because of her addiction and her mother's addiction. The girls, 12 to 18, listened breathlessly and you could feel the silence in the big gym as they took in her words.

    One of the counsellors said, "Mariah, you'v done more in an hour that we can do in months. You words will live on in the hearts of all the girls." She made a powerful difference.

    All of us at Gina's Team looked forward to the times when Mariah visited Mingus to share her story. Even now, especially now, we will continue to share her story and look forward to the annual Panetta family visit. They are all an example of courage and love in their willingness to be vulnerable. When you open up to one person, it's like ripples in a pond. You never know whom they will touch. Everyone hurts and our words have the power to love and heal